"Bob, I am grateful for your time to sit down with me to share your insights and wisdom as a law enforcement officer.  Your insight coming from the “front lines” is valuable to me and I know will be valuable to those who have been victims of sexual assault. Welcome..."

“First let me thank you for the important service EPAR ministries provides for victims of sexual assault.  When you asked me to do this, I spent quite a bit of time contemplating what I might share that would be of value to
someone who has been the victim of a sex crime.  Nearly as important, what could I share that would be significant to the person who knew and cared for someone who had been victimized…which unfortunately, is most of us.”

“Give us some background on your professional career…”

"In 2008, I retired from a thirty-year career in law enforcement as a sworn police officer.  The last eight years I was the Captain of the Detective Division.  An important part of my duties and responsibilities were to oversee the operation of the Sex Crimes Unit and the Juvenile Unit.  These two units often intertwined since children are all too often the victims of sex crimes.  Not every detective wants to be assigned to either of these two Units, as opposed to Homicide or Robbery Units.  Frankly, not every detective is equipped, psychologically and emotionally, to handle sex crimes and crimes where children are victims. 

I developed a great deal of respect for the detectives who worked in those Units.  Some worked for a decade or more yet; they never lost sight of the fact that it was an ordeal for the victim.   I saw first hand the genuine compassion and concern for the victim and her dignity even though they had to remain emotionally detached. They investigated every case energetically, objectively and thoroughly."

“That information is so important to those contemplating whether or not to report the crime.  Not to undo what you said Bob, but after the rape I felt victimized again as I went through the system. Is that because it was 28 years ago”

“Even though a lot has changed since then, due to the nature of a sexual assault it’s not unusual to feel victimized again; even though the Sex Crimes Unit is careful to handle each victim with compassion and concern.”

“You’re right …it is the nature of the assault.  It was very uncomfortable to tell a stranger what happened.  Can I bring someone with me when I report it?

“Yes.  When it is safe to do so call a friend or family member and report the assault as soon as possible, even though you may be afraid. You don’t have to do this alone.”

“To be honest, I was so humiliated I didn’t want anyone I knew with me.”

 “It’s not easy to report this type of crime, but it’s extremely important in order to gather evidence and apprehend the perpetrator as soon as possible.  Your quick actions may also prevent someone else from being victimized.” 

“That was my motivating force.  I did not want what happened to me to happen to anyone else.  A serial rapist broke into my home one month after his release from prison for the crime of rape.  I did report it and so did two other women that he raped in my neighborhood.  A month later he was arrested in Kentucky, brought back to Florida, and charged with three counts of rape.”

“It took courage for the three of you to report the rape.  I cannot emphasize the importance of reporting in detail what you remember, even if you think it is not important.  It could be that one “insignificant” detail or what you think is insignificant, that can make the difference.”

“That brought up a memory...when I gave my deposition the detective asked if anything stood out about the rapist, and there was.  I was ashamed to tell him because I thought he would think I was crazy for thinking it.  I told the detective the rapist had a “gentle” way about him.  I hated saying it because it didn’t make sense to me.”

“You’re right, Laurie… there is nothing gentle about rape.  It is about power and control and rape is a violent crime.”

 “Today, I know that, but it was uncomfortable and shameful to say the word rape and gentle in the same sentence. It still makes me uncomfortable."

"That's part of the process of gathering evidence which can be difficult because you relive the offense giving intimate details just as you did with your deposition."  

"It turned out the two women that reported their rapes said the same word…gentle.  What I deemed insignificant and shameful became very significant in linking the three rapes.  What kind of details are important when reporting the crime?”

“Any mannerism, tattoo, scar, and limp, something unusual about their speech or language.  Body odor could indicate a place of employment.  Nothing is insignificant as you found out.  After the crime is reported, the evidence will be collected at your local Rape Crisis Center."

"I recently visited my local Rape Crisis Center which did not exsist 28 years ago.  I toured the facility and felt the the compassion of those that cared for   victims of sexual assault.  What would you say to women who struggle to break their silence?"

"Reporting the crime...depositions...medical procedures...these are factors that may prevent a victim from reporting a sexual assault or following through after reporting the crime. The process may seem daunting and overwhelming, but knowing you had a part in bringing the offender to justice is empowering!"